Fred, I hope my little ditty didn’t offend you. 

I have known Fred for a lot of years now and consider him a good friend. Let me tell you a story that really happened. Quite a few years ago Fred, Jeffrey and myself were out one afternoon flying. For those who don’t know, Jeffrey is my son. Also for the newer members we used to have a cow problem. Anyway Fred was telling Jeffrey to chase the cows with his plane. And being the nine or ten year old he was at the time. He was doing a pretty good job of it. As a matter of fact he had run them up close to the trees. Well we all know trees and planes don’t mix. Long story short he piled that little plane into that tree. Being nine or ten Jeffrey hadn’t learned not to love planes, and that they don’t love you back. Jeffrey started wellingup like he was going to cry. Fred came over to Jeffrey and told him it was all his fault. He would buy Jeffrey another plane. Hell I thought Fred was going to get upset too. We didn’t take Fred’s offer, but it was appreciated. And never will be forgotten. Jeffrey has gotten older now 17. And young ladies not airplanes excite him now. But as soon as he heard Fred was back he loaded up to go fly with Fred. Welcome Home Fred Sorrentino!

Rules For Flight

1. Every take off is optional. Every landing is mandatory.

2. If you push the stick forward, the houses get bigger. If you pull the stick back, they get smaller. That is, unless you keep pulling the stick all the way back, then they get bigger again.

3. Flying isn't dangerous. Crashing is what's dangerous.

4. It's always better to be down here wishing you were up there than up there wishing you were down here.

5. The ONLY time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire.

6. The propeller is just a big fan in front of the plane used to keep the pilot cool. When it stops, you can actually watch the pilot start sweating.

7. When in doubt, hold on to your altitude. No one has ever collided with the sky.

8. A 'good' landing is one from which you can walk away. A 'great' landing is one after which they can use the plane again.

9. Learn from the mistakes of others. You won't live long enough to make all of them yourself.

10. You know you've landed with the wheels up if it takes full power to taxi to the ramp.

11. The probability of survival is inversely proportional to the angle of arrival. Large angle of arrival, small probability of survival and vice versa.

12. Never let an aircraft take you somewhere your brain didn't get to five minutes earlier.

13. Stay out of clouds. The silver lining everyone keeps talking about might be another airplane going in the opposite direction. Reliable sources also report that mountains have been known to hide out in clouds.

14. Always try to keep the number of landings you make equal to the number of take offs you've made.

15. There are three simple rules for making a smooth landing. Unfortunately no one knows what they are.

16. You start with a bag full of luck and an empty bag of experience. The trick is to fill the bag of experience before you empty the bag of luck.

17. If all you can see out of the window is ground that's going round and round and all you can hear is commotion coming from the passenger compartment, things are not at all as they should be.

18. In the ongoing battle between objects made of aluminum going hundreds of miles per hour and the ground going zero miles per hour, the ground has yet to lose.

19. Good judgment comes from experience Unfortunately, the experience usually comes from bad judgment.

20. It's always a good idea to keep the pointy end going forward as much as possible.

21. Keep looking around. There's always something you've missed.

22. Remember, gravity is not just a good idea. It's the law. And it's not subject to repeal.

23. The four most useless things to a pilot are the altitude above you, runway behind you, gas back at the airport, and a tenth of a second ago.

24. There are old pilots and there are bold pilots. There are, however, no old, bold pilots.